Cows marched one after the other, silent and expressionless, into the slaughterhouse. Patty needed more beef if it was going to win the war. Most of the world fell under its control without anyone noticing as Patty’s beef was spread. Unfortunately, many people and cultures refused to eat much if any beef and Patty had to take those by force. And so Patty marched its forces onward. People made for better soldiers than the cows did, but that meant sacrificing more cows to feed to the humans in order to keep them under control. Even still, Patty’s influence was so large now, losing these few cows felt more like the trimming of a tail.

   This world will be mine, Patty thought to itself while it, as a human, slaughtered itself, as a cow, over and over. Each slaughtered cow was parsed into its different parts, packaged, and then shipped throughout Patty’s territory. Each human needed roughly a quarter of a pound of beef every third day to keep them under control. The excess patties were sent to the front lines where they would be disguised in veggie-burgers, cakes, chocolates, and just about anything else Patty could find that would mask the initial taste of the meat. Once the unsuspecting person was under Patty’s control, it would take them to the nearest beef dispensary where they would eat a full patty. After that it was only a matter of time and patience to sneak beef into the food of the person’s friends and family.

   Other countries were less than blind to what was going on. Every cow had been killed in East Asia and left to rot. Patty had no choice but to send actual soldiers there in an effort to enforce its will on them. Even with the resistance Patty was receiving, it calculated that it would only take another couple of months before it had total control of the world.

   And then…

   Patty wasn’t sure. Its original plan was to kill the humans, but now with their minds as a part of its own, the genius it unlocked was amazing. A world, a universe, far beyond and greater than the grassy fields Patty’s bovine minds were limited to. Could Patty let that go? The human need to discover, to create, their curiosity, were all so unexpected…and so wonderful. To a cow, the sky was just the sky. But to a human, the sky was another field to explore, with far greener pastures and sweeter clover than anything else previously tasted.

   The slaughter house fell silent and the sudden lack of activity distracted Patty from its contemplation. Both the humans and the cows stood still, some of them caught in the middle of a motion, a step, a cut. Patty told them to resume. They obeyed and the slaughter house regained it’s usual sounds. Patty frowned. This was not the first time such a thing had occurred. In fact, it seemed to be happening more frequently. The psychologists in Patty thought it might be due to its indecision about its actions whereas the neurologists in Patty theorized it might be reaching the maximum limit of minds that it could control. Patty wished it could get a second opinion but knew such a thing was not reasonable.

   China attacked on the western front and Patty had to shift its attention.

   Things had been quiet along the border for some time and Patty had been expecting the attack. Air strikes rained down on the ground troops, a necessary sacrifice, while Patty swooped in with its own fighter jets. Patty was an expert pilot and each jet flew in perfect formation. Patty had no blind-spot, and the enemy jets were destroyed in moments. Once they were gone, the main assault pressed in and the Chinese front began to break. At the same time, Patty’s Australian forces reached the shore along the South China Sea and began their march Westward. Every prisoner captured was force fed a huge amount of beef to sustain Patty’s hold over them for an extended period and then released with a backpack full of jerky. Each new captive was to go out and ‘recruit’ others to the cause.

   The final push had begun and Patty set its worries aside. It would worry over what it would do next after it had won the war.