There were a lot of places Hawa would rather be, and a number of things she would rather be doing. As it was, she was stuck standing in a line with her brother, Moussa. He was a year younger than she was, but already he was getting to be nearly as tall. For years he had begged and pleaded with their parents to let him go to the yearly carnival, and every year they had told him no. Hawa had also made similar pleas to her parents and the year before she had been allowed to go. She and her friends had explored every inch of the carnival and spent their savings on rides, games, and food. This year though, Hawa had to supervise Moussa.

“Why can’t you take him?” Hawa had asked her parents.

“He’s not allowed to go places with us,” her parents had said, “you know that. He lost that privilege.”

“You could let him go on his own.”

“He doesn’t know how to handle himself on his own like you do. Just take him along with you and your friends.”

“They won’t want to be around him,” Hawa explained, “you know how he gets.”

Her parents gave her their ‘you’re going to do this’ look and Hawa gave up trying to convince them otherwise. She knew if she kept pressing the issue that she’d likely end up not being allowed to go, with or without Moussa.

And so it was that Hawa and Moussa were standing in line for a ride that Hawa was neither interested in nor very comfortable with riding. It was a new ride that hadn’t been there the year before that spun in so many different directions at once that just watching it made Hawa dizzy. Moussa, on the other hand, couldn’t take his eyes off of it.

“Look at it!” He repeated from time to time, sometimes tugging on Hawa’s sleeve to add emphasis. “Aren’t you excited?”

Hawa never responded with more than a few noncommittal shrugs or murmurs. In reality, she was just hoping that once they’d ridden it once they could move on to the other rides and games that she was more interested in. With luck they’d run into some of her friends and they could hang out for a while, though she knew that with her brother in tow they wouldn’t linger. None of her friends really liked her brother and Hawa couldn’t blame them. When it was just Hawa and Moussa, he was alright, but whenever her friends were around it was as though he transformed into a monster. He’d jump into their faces, make loud noises, sometimes he’d even go so far as to pull their hair or jump on their backs. He did the same thing to the kids his own age too and that meant he pretty much had no friends. He just didn’t know how to interact with other people and he seemed oblivious that his current efforts were futile, no matter how many times their parents tried to sit him down and explain why people didn’t like his behavior.

Since the ride was so obviously new and exciting, the line seemed to go on forever compared to the other rides. Some of Hawa’s favorites from the year before didn’t even have a line.

“Moussa,” Hawa began, “this line’s going to take forever. Why don’t we go try some of those other rides?”

Moussa barely gave the other rides a fleeting glance before shaking his head.

“Nah,” he said, “this one’s the best one.”

“Well, how about you stay in this line and save my spot while I go on a few of those other rides?” Hawa tried.

Moussa gave her a flat stare.

“We’re suppose to stick together,” he reminded her of their parents instructions.

“I’ll know exactly where you are, and I’ll come back here after each other ride I go on so that you can know where I am.”

Moussa narrowed his eyes while he considered this.

“And I can bring you back some candy or food or something,” Hawa said to sweeten the deal.

It was too much for Moussa, however, and he shook his head as suspicion flooded his face.

“You’re just going to leave me!” He accused her.

“Whatever, never mind!” Hawa sighed in frustration. She probably would have left him after the first couple of rides, but she didn’t want to admit it. With how long the line was, she wouldn’t be too surprised if, by the time they actually got to go on the ride, it would be time to go home.

Minute after minute passed and they inched along in the line that, as Hawa got a better view of it, wound around the ride several times and then trailed back through a good portion of the carnival to where they stood, waiting. Even still, Moussa was not deterred. With every little half step they took forward he bristled with excitement. The sun rose up in the sky and began lowering as they finally reached the spiral portion of the line.

“Look at it!” Moussa repeated, pointing with eagerness as the ride spun and twirled.

Hawa felt her stomach turn when she looked at it and she quickly looked away.

“Moussa, I don’t think I can go on that ride with you,” she told him. “I’m getting sick just looking at it.”

“Aww, come on,” he pleaded with her, “it says you can’t ride it alone and I don’t want to get stuck with some weirdo.”

“I’m pretty sure that you would be the weirdo in that situation,” Hawa teased.

Moussa gave a guilty grin in return.

“But come on,” he went on, “you have to ride it with me.”

“Sorry but I don’t feel like throwing up today,” Hawa said.

Moussa frowned and crossed his arms.

“Mom and Dad said you had to come with me!”

“They said I had to come with you to the carnival,” Hawa corrected him, “not that I had to do everything you wanted to do, and I’m pretty sure I don’t want to ride this thing.”

“Oh, come on!” Moussa stamped his foot, “We’ve waited this long already!”

“I know,” Hawa exclaimed, “and I don’t want to keep wasting my time standing in line for a ride that I don’t want to go on.”

“I’m not leaving,” Moussa stated and he turned his back on her, facing forward in line once more. “If you want to leave then leave, but I’ll tell Mom and Dad that you abandoned me.”

Hawa wanted to smack her little brother but she knew better than that. Starting a fight with Moussa was certain to land her in trouble.

They didn’t talk to one another the majority of the rest of the time that they stood in line for the ride. The day wore on and Hawa was both hungry and thirsty by the time they reached the front of the line. By then, Moussa had mostly forgotten about their argument and had resumed his frequent exclamations to look at the ride and he was practically bouncing from side to side as they drew near to their turn.

“Ten tickets, please,” the ride operator told them as they approached and Hawa felt a weight in her stomach that had nothing to do with her watching the ride spin.

“How many tickets?” Hawa asked.

It cost tickets to go on each ride, but most of them were only one or two tickets. The most she’d seen before was three tickets for a ride.

“It’s ten tickets per person,” the operator repeated and held out his hand.

Moussa was already counting out his ten to had over but Hawa was more reluctant. This one ride would cost them more than half of their tickets each! Had she known ahead of time she would have refused straight away to even get in line, though she wasn’t sure how Moussa would have handled that. He may have still just gone and joined the queue with threats of telling their parents that she’d abandoned him.

“Ten tickets, please,” the operator said again with a bit more force.

Moussa was already strapping himself into his seat and the people behind Hawa were shifting impatiently behind her.

“Fine,” she huffed and handed over the tickets.

She strapped herself in beside Moussa and refused to answer him when he asked if she was excited. She was too furious to speak to him. They’d wasted the day standing in line for this one ride that had now cost her most of her tickets, which meant she wouldn’t be able to go on the rides she had been really excited about. She was hungry, thirsty, her feet were sore from standing in line for so long, and as the ride began to move she knew she was going to be sick.

“This is awesome!” Moussa shouted from beside her while the world turned and twisted back and forth.

Hawa tried shutting her eyes but that only made it worse. She tried finding a spot on the horizon where she could focus on but they were spinning too fast and in too many directions for her to be able to find any consistent point.

The hot, sweaty nausea that precedes throwing up began to well up inside her stomach. It crept up her chest and into her throat.

“Make it stop make it stop make it stop,” Hawa began repeating over and over, in reference to both the ride and the sickness she was feeling.

Pressure in her gut and in the back of her throat suddenly rose and she began to dry heave. She hadn’t eaten anything for hours, and for a moment she thought she would luck out with an empty stomach. It wasn’t to be.

Hot and burning, she felt the raw stomach acid rising suddenly and she tried to lean as far forward as she could to avoid throwing up all over herself. With the ride spinning as it was, she might as well have just sat still. Cries and shouts of disgust erupted from everyone around her as they were showered in her sick. People down below also shouted out, though they sounded much more entertained and excited by the spectacle. The ride slowed down and then stopped and people began unbuckling themselves, wiping faces and shaking out clothes as best they could.

Hawa felt terrible. She was shaking and weak and wasn’t sure she could stand up without passing out. So she stayed seated for a bit, ignoring everything going on around her until the nausea finally began to subside.

“Come on, Hawa!” Moussa was saying to her and she was surprised to see that he was practically untouched by her vomit. “We gotta get out of the way so they can finish cleaning it off.”

Hawa allowed him to lead her away and they eventually found a bench to sit down on. She was grateful that it faced away from the ride.

“That was such a great ride!” Moussa said at once. “Too bad you had to ruin it by throwing up.”

Hawa looked at him in shock.

“Really?” Hawa asked. “I told you I didn’t want to go on this ride. I told you it was going to make me sick. I even suggested we go find other rides to go on. Now we’re practically out of tickets, I’m covered in vomit, and I don’t even want to go on any more rides.”

“Cool,” Moussa said, brightening, “you can give me the rest of your tickets then and I can go on it again.”

He was already reaching for her tickets when Hawa slapped his hand away.

“Whatever happened to me needing to stay with you?” Hawa asked. “And not wanting to have to ride with some weirdo?”

Moussa shrugged and tried to grab her tickets again.

“Stop it!” Hawa told him more firmly. “We’re going home!”

She still didn’t feel great but she was steady enough now to get going.

“What?” Moussa complained, “But we only got to go on the one ride!”

“Yeah, I know,” Hawa said as her anger rose, “you think this is how I wanted to spend my day at the carnival?”

“It’s not fair!” Moussa went on but Hawa ignored him.

Before long they were back outside the carnival gates where they’d chained up their bicycles. Hawa undid the locks and slung the chains around her shoulder. Moussa was furious but said nothing as he mounted his bike and took off towards home. He didn’t wait for her and Hawa took her time. She didn’t have the strength to try and keep up anyway. She knew Moussa wanted to get home first so he could tell their parents about all the terrible things she’d done to him and how unfairly she’d treated him. She didn’t care. She was too tired, too sick, too drained to care.

Sure enough, when she walked into living room, Moussa was there, plowing ahead.

“…and she threatened to leave me if I didn’t do everything she said,” he was saying in as pitiful a voice as he could muster.

“I don’t care if you believe him or me,” Hawa said, interrupting Moussa and surprising her parents when they looked up to see her still covered in vomit. “You can ground me, or whatever, but I’m never taking him anywhere with me again.”

Moussa’s face fell. Their parents had already made it clear that he wasn’t welcome to go anywhere with them, which was why Hawa was so often left to take Moussa places.

“Now, Hawa,” their Dad began.

“No,” Hawa cut in. “I’m done. Moussa wouldn’t listen, made constant threats about trying to get me in trouble, and in the end we spent over four hours standing in line for a single ride that made me throw up all over everyone. I’m done, I’m done, I’m done. He’s your son, not mine. If you want him to go places and learn how to behave than you deal with him. I’m going to take a shower.”

“Wait a minute,” her Mom called after her as she began to move towards the bathroom.

“I’m literally dripping barf onto the carpet,” Hawa told her, not slowing down or looking back.

She would most likely be in trouble, she knew, but she also knew she was done being the one who would have to pick up the slack with regards to taking care of Moussa. He either had to learn to behave, or he could just stay home and do nothing. From inside the bathroom she could still hear her parents voices but they didn’t seem to be directed at her. Maybe Moussa was going to get in trouble after all. Maybe their parents would finally stop shifting him off onto her to deal with. Whatever they decided on could wait though. Right now she was just going to enjoy a hot shower and the thrill she felt at finally standing up for herself.