The second hand on the clock sliced the crawling time in silent ticks. It was odd to see the motion without hearing anything. Most clocks with a second hand made at least some ticking sound. This clock was an exception.

There were other sounds, of course. Muffled voices sometimes drifted in from outside the room, and there was a soft hiss of gasses and the gentle hum of electricity.

Lin was situated somewhere between lying and sitting in the hospital bed. It didn’t matter how she adjusted the bed to suit her, whenever the nurses or doctor came in to check on her they set her bed to this setting. After the first couple of weeks of asking them to leave it alone, and being ignored, she gave up and left the bed as it was. Maybe there was some medical reason for this position. Maybe the doctor and nurses thought this was a more comfortable position. Lin didn’t care, really, what their reason was. It took too much energy to readjust her bed after every check-up.

Moving was a chore most of the time. She was tired, so incredibly tired, and yet she could hardly sleep. The pain in her body seemed to soak right down into her bones. Sometimes it was dull and throbbing, other times it was sharp and unbearable, but it was always present. There was no true respite from it. The only good thing was she didn’t have to worry about the rest of the school year. She hadn’t been enjoying 11th grade much and this was as good as any excuse to get out of classes.

Someone knocked on her door and then, without waiting for a response, the nurse poked his head into the room.

“You’ve got some visitors, Lin,” he chimed in the practiced manner of most nurses and doctors Lin had met.

“Thank you,” Lin replied and began shifting herself this way and that so she could sit up better in her bed. Over time she tended to sag down from the incline and she didn’t like how it made her look, hunched down on her bed. People tended to comment more on how tired she looked when she stayed in that position, anyway, and she didn’t like those comments.

Beneath smocks and face mask, three people stepped carefully into the room. They walked as though the noise of their footsteps would aggravate Lin.

“You’re all walking like the floor’s thin ice,” Lin told them with a half-smile.

The three visitors hesitated as they became aware of how they were moving and then settled into a more natural cadence. Lin shut her eyes while they shifted chairs around so they could all sit more easily by her bedside. The room was kept fairly dark but even then her eyes tended to have a hard time handling being used for very long before she would start to get a headache.

“How’s everyone?” Lin asked before any of them could ask her how she was doing.

It should be obvious to everyone how she was doing, and she hated going over the same old lab results every time someone came to visit.

“We’re good,” came the reply and Lin recognized it as belonging to her friend, Masha.

“I didn’t realize it was you, Masha,” Lin chuckled. “Between the smock and face mask it’s hard to tell who’s who.” She opened her eyes again and looked at the other two. “Who else is hiding beneath those masks?”

“Shaun and Devonne,” Masha said.

“Hey,” Shaun murmured with a noncommittal wave.

“Good to see you,” Devonne said with similar uncertainty.

Masha had come by to visit before but this was the first time either Shaun or Devonne had come to see her. The three of them, Masha, Shaun, and Devonne usually shared a table at lunch and Lin had always been welcome to join them.

“What time is it?” Lin asked. “School already out?”

She had been watching the clock tick through the day just moments before they had arrived but hadn’t actually been paying attention to what time it was. Still, it didn’t seem like enough of the day had passed for the school day to be ended.

“We figured we’d swing by during lunch today,” Masha explained, “so we won’t be able to stay long.”

A small knot formed in Lin’s throat but she managed to hide the sudden upwelling of emotion. It wasn’t that she was afraid of crying in front of them. Rather, she didn’t want to waste the energy that crying would drain from her. All the same, her gratitude for them giving up their lunch break to come visit her meant so much.

“Thanks guys,” Lin sighed, and then winced as the pain in her chest and right shoulder spiked.

“You okay?” Shaun asked.

“Heh,” Lin said through gritted teeth while she waited for the pain to subside. “It’s nothing new. Just another day in the life for me.”

“You’re looking pretty good,” Devonne put in, sounding as though she were trying to find something to compliment.

“It’s natural,” Lin flicked her left hand through her hair and managed to strike an approximation of a pose while suppressing the pain.

The others chuckled and silence began to settle in. She hated silence. She already had so much silence when she was alone that she didn’t want it now that she had company.

“So, what’s new at school?” Lin asked.

“Not much,” Masha replied. “Football lost, again, and we had another cheerleader get dropped on the field trying to do some stunt so now the cheer coaches have been suspended while they do a review on their coaching. I guess some of the parents think the coaches are trying to teach them stunts that are too dangerous or something. So anyway, in the meantime the cheer leaders can only stand on the sidelines and shake their pom poms.”

“And they announced the theme for the Spring dance,” Devonne added.

Masha and Shaun both rolled their eyes and groaned.

“I thought it was already announced,” Lin said. “Wasn’t it ‘The Apocalypse’ or something?”

“It was,” Devonne said, “but Principle Birdman,” she went on, stressing the nickname most students used for Principle Birman, “decided it was too violent.”

“Makes sense,” Lin nodded. “So what did he change it to? Emergency Preparedness?”

“Actually, yeah,” Devonne grimaced.

“You’re kidding me?”

Lin had only been joking with her guess. Principle Birman was known for trying to suck the fun out of everything by turning it into a ‘learning experience’ but this was an all new level for him.

“So, like, what is he expecting to have happen?” Lin asked. “Is everyone going to wear orange vests and hard hats?”

The three others just shrugged.

“I already had my outfit picked out before they changed themes,” Masha said, “and I’m not going to go out and buy another one. If they have a problem with it, I’ll just point out that the Apocalypse would be a pretty big emergency and I’m just getting prepared for it.”

“I’m sure Birdman will love that,” Lin muttered.

“What’s he going to do?” Masha asked defiantly. “I won’t be breaking any dress codes so it’s not like he can’t throw me out.”

“I wonder how many people we could get to still dress for the Apocalypse?” Shaun mused with a sly grin.

“I honestly don’t think it would be that hard to convince people,” Masha agreed. “It’s probably easier for most people to come up with an Apocalypse costume. Seriously, I don’t know what Birdman is expecting, are we supposed to show up with first aid kits and MRE’s? That’s not a costume. That’s a backpack of junk.”

Devonne checked the time on her phone and frowned.

“We gotta get going,” Devonne said.

“Already?” Lin asked.

“Yeah, sorry,” Devonne said and the three of them began getting back up on their feet and shifting the chairs back against the wall.

Lin made herself smile while they all said their goodbyes. She was happy and enjoying the visit but she was also getting tired now. More tired than usual. Her eyes hurt from being open and focused so much, and it was an effort to concentrate on the conversation. Yet even with all of that, she didn’t want the visit to end. They had only just started to really talk.

As the door shut behind her friends, Lin felt the quiet stillness of the room settle back into place. She closed her eyes, so tired and in so much pain. For a moment during the visit she could almost forget about the pain. Perhaps she was tired enough that she would be able to sleep.

She leaned her bed back down flat, knowing as she did so that a nurse was bound to come in to check on her any minute now and that they’d readjust her bed in doing so. She just wanted to sleep, though, and she always slept better lying flat on her back.

The subtle noises of the room began to fade as Lin started to drift off to sleep. It had been days since she’d last slept, really slept, and she knew she was finally going to get –

“Hello, Lin,” the nurse called out and Lin’s eyes shot open in surprise.

She hadn’t heard the nurse come in and was surprised to find him standing right beside her.

“Did you have a good visit with your friends?” he asked while checking her monitors.

He began placing the blood pressure cuff around her arm and didn’t seem to expect a response from her.

“Just gotta check your vitals and then I’ll get out of your hair. Oh,” he added in surprise, “let me fix your bed for you.”

He moved to grab the controller for the bed but Lin smacked his hand. Her body instantly protested against the movement and pain flooded her body.

“Touch it and I’ll scream,” she managed through gritted teeth. “I don’t want you or anyone else adjusting my bed ever again.”

“But I’m,” the nurse began but Lin was already yanking the blood pressure cuff off and he failed to complete his sentence.

“Get out!” Lin cried out at him and she felt her chest and throat tightening as tears began to run down her face. “Can’t you just leave me alone for a few hours?”

“Now let’s calm down,” the nurse said, still in his bedside voice that only made Lin even more angry. “I’m just checking your vitals and fixing your bed.”

“There’s nothing wrong with me bed!” Lin finally managed to shout and paid for it as the pain exploded and she couldn’t help but grab at her chest and gasp for air through the pain.

“I’m getting the doctor,” the nurse said hastily and rushed out of the room.

With what little coordination she still had, Lin tucked the bed controller underneath her pillow and then stared up at the ceiling. The edges of her vision were fogging over and she still couldn’t breathe right, the pain was too intense and sharp every time she tried to take in a breath.

She was tired of being in silence, tired of not having control over her life, tired of not even being able to determine the shape of her bed.

Maybe now, with everyone gone from the room and her bed lying flat, she’d be able to sleep.

Lin pulled the blanket up tightly around herself and shut her eyes.