(Photo by Sergei Starostin)

Luck was a strange concept to BaBS-Y. So was Irony.

The odds of there being any other robots within reach of BaBS-Y that had compatible memory drives were minuscule since most robot manufacturers tended to make their components unique to themselves. Certainly there were third part manufacturers, but they still usually had to tailor their products to specific product lines.

Usually.

As the salon robot stood in the entryway of Star Jewelry, both luck and irony were brought forward for consideration. STEVs came with an assortment of low-grade hardware, especially when compared to most modern robots. BaBS-Y wasn’t generally compatible with their hardware but according to the Thesis’ records this particular STEV had been upgraded in a very specific manner. In order to be able to properly identify and appraise precious stones, STEV had needed more enhanced visual systems, and in order for those systems to function, the robot needed more memory.

I am in need of your upgraded memory drives, BaBS-Y informed the other robot via the portable display.

Authorities have been notified of your attempted theft,the wall displays showed. They are on their way.

Thesis authorities no longer oversee this sector, was BaBS-Y’s reply. I require your upgraded memory drives

STEV did not offer any further response so BaBS-Y walked into the establishment and moved to deactivate the other robot. Immediately, STEV pivoted away and held out its arms to keep BaBS-Y from approaching any further.

You are not authorized to make modifications to this unit, the wall display read. The authorities have been alerted to your criminal behavior.

You are unable to submit crime reports…Communications with this sector have been terminated

There was no response for a few seconds but eventually the wall displays changed.

You are correct.

BaBS-Y moved once again to try and deactivate the other robot but again it pulled away and kept BaBS-Y at arms length.

You are not authorized to make modifications to this unit.

Authorization is not required in the absence of Thesis authorities

STEV was obviously not convinced and did not lower its guard. BaBS-Y was reluctant to engage STEV physically but it had gotten around this robot before.

I need you to run the last set of calculations I asked you about when I was detained in the workroom

The wall display flickered and BaBS-Y anticipated STEV to shut down shortly. Instead, a new message appeared.

You are attempting to overload my systems. Security protocols have been updated. Authorities will be updated as soon as communications have been restored. You must vacate this premises at once.

That was not what BaBS-Y had been expecting to happen. It needed the memory drives, and while it knew STEV was most likely going to refuse to simply give up its memory drives, BaBS-Y had thought that it would be able to overheat the robot like it had done before. Clearly it had underestimated STEV’s programming.

For a moment, BaBS-Y considered activating its creativity protocols but decided against it. Though the two robots were fairly matched in their strength, BaBS-Y did have a few tricks up its sleeve, so to speak.

Uncommon though it may be, there were times when people would become upset with a robot and try to attack it or damage it in some way. It was fairly standard for most robots to have at least a basic set of self defense protocols, much like how STEV was behaving now with BaBS-Y seeking to take its memory drives. Those who had programmed BaBS-Y knew it was a slim robot and not built to take a beating. Just a few punches with its delicate hands could severely damage BaBS-Y’s fingers and wrists and so they’d equipped it with a retractable baton in each forearm. It was lightweight but sturdy and BaBS-Y could swing with quite fast and hard without worrying about damaging its more important, more fragile components.

The moment BaBS-Y extended its batons, STEV backed even further away.

Hostility towards Star Jewelry –

The wall display began to display its new message but BaBS-Y ignored it, jabbing first with its left baton and then with its right, stabbing expertly into STEV’s two main cameras. Like most robots, STEV had several cameras and sensors to take in and process its surroundings but the two anthropomorphized eyes were the main ones. Without them, STEV would be at a severe disadvantage.

The other robot recoiled from the blows, raising its arms up to shield its head from further attacks. As it did, BaBS-Y swung and brought a baton down hard towards STEV’s elbow. Joints were always a weak spot and BaBS-Y’s self defense protocols identified elbows and knees as being particularly high priority targets. Since STEV had no knees, BaBS-Y had chosen the elbows. Unfortunately, while STEV and humans shared many traits regarding their physical appearance and basic structure, the robot was made from steel and aluminum and not flesh and bone.

There was a powerful wrenching and even a dull thud registered in BaBS-Y’s auditory sensors when the baton met STEV’s elbow. The joint bent and STEV jerked awkwardly away as the force of BaBS-Y’s strike carried through, but the baton shattered. Only a jagged stump protruded out from the slot in BaBS-Y’s arm now. Useless against a robot like STEV.

Having lost the initial surprise, BaBS-Y ducked back as it anticipated a retaliatory attack. Sure enough, STEV straightened back up and struck out with its undamaged arm, barely missing BaBS-Y. They stood there for a moment, appraising the situation. STEV had large, spiderweb cracks obscuring its two main camera lenses and one damaged arm but still had the slight advantage of strength on its side. BaBS-Y on the other hand was undamaged apart from the broken baton.

Slowly, BaBS-Y crept forward once again. STEV followed each movement, keeping its guard up, wary of the next attack. BaBS-Y sprung, slashing and striking at the side of STEV’s head where more of its visual sensors were located. STEV blocked awkwardly with its damaged arm and then grabbed hold of BaBS-Y with its good arm. Before BaBS-Y could break loose, STEV yanked BaBS-Y forward into the display cabinet. Rather than fight the momentum, BaBS-Y moved with it, rolling over the counter and getting behind STEV. It was the arm with the undamaged baton that STEV had grabbed and so BaBS-Y stabbed at STEV’s head with the broken end of the other baton, breaking several more sensors.

In a flash, BaBS-Y was no longer standing behind STEV. Instead, it was being flung up and over STEV’s head. The other robot had pulled down hard on BaBS-Y’s arm while at the same time bending over and essentially turning itself into one large lever over which BaBS-Y was thrown. The salon robot came down with a crash on top of the display counter, shattering glass and twisting the metal trays. BaBS-Y watched as STEV tried to bring its other arm down onto BaBS-Y’s face but the broken elbow joint prevented the strike from landing as the arm seized up, mere inches from BaBS-Y.

STEV’s grip on BaBS-Y’s arm was still too strong to break free from and, lying in the ruined counter with its arm twisted back awkwardly, BaBS-Y was uncertain how best to extricate itself. Fortunately, STEV was still trying to bash BaBS-Y with its damaged arm, granting precious time to figure out a solution.

Activate Creativity Protocols

Like most robots, BaBS-Y was not limited to the basic binocular vision of humans. It, too, had several different devices that took in visual information to help it understand its surroundings. It could even see behind itself.

Lying on its back on the counter, BaBS-Y’s head and legs dangled over opposing sides. It hadn’t ever paid much attention to the floor in Star Jewelry before but now, it noticed how the track system that STEV moved on, besides being limited to just behind the counter, was also unshielded. There ought to have been a flexible cover to keep dirt and debris from falling into it but there were only fragments of it remaining.

Certain flexible materials can become brittle when exposed to cold temperatures

Looking down into the track, BaBS-Y could see the bearings and gears that moved STEV back and forth. Using its free hand, BaBS-Y began scraping jewelry and broken glass off of the counter and down onto the floor below. Soon it began to collect in the track. It wouldn’t know if it had done anything to STEV’s mobility until BaBS-Y tested it so it swung its legs up and over, pivoting itself to land beside STEV. Not wanting to put too much strain on the one arm STEV was still holding, BaBS-Y used its free hand to take hold of STEV’s wrist and then pulled back with all its strength.

The sudden motion and change of direction caught STEV off guard. It tried to counter and move with BaBS-Y but the track jammed after moving only a few inches. STEV lurched and for a brief moment the combined momentum of both robots was focused on the one connection point between STEV and the track.

BaBS-Y felt the brief hesitation and then the snap. Both robots fell to the ground and finally STEV’s grip on BaBS-Y loosened as it thrashed about, trying to right itself. Before anything else could happen, BaBS-Y located and then pressed on the panel that would deactivate STEV. The other robot shuddered and finally lay still.

In all the commotion, BaBS-Y’s tether had become entangled around STEV and it took some time to free itself fully.

Deactivate Creativity Protocols

…

System Diagnostic Scan

There were some minor fractures in the arm STEV had grabbed, particularly around the shoulder and wrist joints where the most strain had been, but everything was still functional and nothing seemed likely to worsen with normal use. It retrieved its tools, such as they were, and set to work. The additional memory drives were, after all, what BaBS-Y had come to get.