(Photo by Helena Lopes)

Dr Roche’s office was set up like a living room with couches, armchairs, and a coffee table. Potted plants of various sizes were tucked into the corners and on shelves. There was even a short rack with fluffy blankets and a sign reading “Feel free to use a blanket during your session”.

“Come in and have a seat,” Dr Roche smiled at Simeon. “Sit anywhere you like. Can I get you something to drink? I’ve got a few sodas, bottled water, grape juice.”

“I’m fine, thanks,” Simeon replied and sat down on one of the couches.

Dr Roche sat down in one of the armchairs facing Simeon and let him get comfortable before speaking.

“So tell me a bit about what you’ve been experiencing,” she said.

“I’ve been hearing voices,” Simeon began. “But it’s the voices of the people I’m around. It sounds just like they’re talking, but they’re not. Like I’m hearing what they’re thinking. My roommate thinks I’m psychic. He’s been trying to have conversations with me where he doesn’t talk but I still hear what he was going to say. He recorded us this morning even.”

Dr Roche frowned slightly at that.

“Possibly the roommate’s faking it.”

It was Dr Roche’s voice but Simeon noticed her lips didn’t move so he ignored the comment.

“I’ve also been seeing some things that I don’t think are real,” Simeon continued. “Last week I dropped a plate but it sort of just stopped midair and floated there until I grabbed it again. My roommate saw that, too.”

“When you’re hearing people’s voices, what sort of things are they saying?” Dr Roche asked.

“Normal stuff,” Simeon said. “Like, so normal that for a while I thought it was just them talking.”

“Do they ever say anything strange?”

“Not really,” Simeon replied. “I think the weirdest it’s ever gotten was when I heard a co-worker say how pretty our boss was when she was standing right there.”

“How long has this been going on for?”

“I’m not sure, but I think it’s been around a year, maybe. Like I said, I thought it was just people talking.”

“You didn’t notice the people weren’t moving their mouths?”

“I’m not always looking right at whoever I’m hearing, but even when I was, I assumed it was my eyes playing tricks on me.”

“Do you ever hear voices of people you can’t see?”

“You mean like they’re not real, or like they’re around a corner or something?”

“Either one.”

“Well, I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone who wasn’t near by, but I have heard them when they were on the other side of a wall or door. I even hear them before I know they’re there. And it always sounds like they’re right next to me, not muffled or anything.”

“You mentioned your roommate thinks you’re psychic, how long has he been saying that?”

“He only found out a few weeks ago,” Simeon said, “but at first he thought I was joking with him.”

“How long have you been roommates?”

“A couple years.”

“You two get along alright?”

“Yeah, that’s why we’ve stayed for so long.”

“How long have you known each other?” Dr Roche asked.

“Two years. We were grouped together in Freshman year, and since we didn’t get on each other’s nerves we didn’t see a reason to change. But that’s as far as it goes for us. We have different majors, different friends, all that. We only see each other at the apartment.”

The conversation moved on to Simeon’s family, if there was any history of similar things happening to his relatives, which there wasn’t. They then talked about his studies and how he was enjoying them, getting decent grades, as well as how his job was going.

“I just don’t have any big stress in my life, you know?” Simeon said near the end of their hour long meeting.

“Stress isn’t always the cause,” Dr Roche replied. “Sometimes things just happen.”

“So what do I do?” Simeon asked.

“Well, from the sounds of it, the voices you’re hearing aren’t saying anything problematic, correct?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“The visual hallucinations have been mostly of objects moving oddly but not in frightening or threatening ways?”

“Yeah, like the plate, or sometimes my pen will slide away when I reach for it.”

“And what would you like to accomplish through our sessions?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, there are some people who hear things, but since those things aren’t in and of themselves problematic they have chosen to focus on recognizing the hallucinations for what they are and ignoring them. Others find that ignoring the hallucinations is not the best option for them so they use medications to help manage their hallucinations. It all really comes down to how intrusive or problematic the hallucinations are to your quality of life.”

“Isn’t hearing things bad?” Simeon asked. “Shouldn’t I try to stop it from happening?”

“Just hearing things isn’t bad in and of itself,” Dr Roche replied, “but if what you’re experiencing is interfering with your ability to enjoy life, to work, to study and go to class, then we can absolutely work on that.”

“What are my options with meds?” he asked. “And what about side effects?

“There are a few medications we can try out,” Dr Roche said. “As for side effects, everyone seems to react a bit differently. Usually it’s mild but we begin on a low dosage to be sure.”

“Can I think about it?” Simeon asked.

“Of course,” Dr Roche replied. “In the mean time make sure you make another appointment for next week. If anything changes or you really need some help, don’t hesitate to call. And if what you’re experiencing becomes too much and you’re worried about your safety, just go straight to the emergency room and they can help you out.”

Simeon nodded and thanked Dr Roche. He made an appointment for the next week. While the receptionist added him into the schedule, Simeon heard her voice even though she was clearly not speaking.

“This one’s cute,” she said. “Probably already dating someone. All the cute ones are always already taken. Or they have problems. Jenny warned me about dating people I meet here. Everyone here has problems or they wouldn’t be here.”

Simeon shifted his weight, uncomfortable as he tried to ignore her voice in his head.

“I doubt the roommate’s involved,” Dr Roche’s voice cut in. “Though his encouragement might aggravate it.”

“…nice guys never ask you out while your working anyway,” the receptionist went on. “I’m even wearing my fake wedding ring to keep the creeps at bay, so of course he’s not going to ask me out with it on.”

Simeon had to admit the receptionist was attractive, but a lot of what he’d heard her saying in his head made sense, and he wasn’t the type to just ask someone out, especially not here. Though, it had been a while since he’d last been on a date. He had no girlfriend to speak of.

“You’re all set,” the receptionist finally said and handed him a reminder card.

“Thanks,” Simeon said, taking the card and putting it away in his wallet.

He was just stepping out the door when her voice came again, talking in his head.

“If this were a movie he’d come racing back in here and ask me on a date. Real life is stupid.”

Simeon hesitated. On the one hand, he was hearing voices that weren’t real and going back in there would definitely place him closer to the crazy guy side of the spectrum. On the other hand, this could be a great way to prove to himself how fictional the voices he was hearing really were.

He turned around and went back in.

“I’m really sorry,” he said as the receptionist looked up at him.

Was he imagining the excitement in her expression or was that apprehension or concern? Simeon thought back to what he’d heard her voice say and chose his questions carefully.

“Are you Jenny’s friend?”

“I am,” she replied, now looking more curious. “Oh my gosh is this happening?” he voice said in Simeon’s head.

Of course, Jenny was a common enough name that he could have been lucky with that one.

“And the wedding ring’s a fake then?” he asked, pointing to her left hand.

“Jenny told you that?” she said before her voice added in his head, “Thank you Jenny!”

Her real, spoken answer wasn’t a yes or a no, but she did take the ring off and put it in her pocket.

“No, I,” he faltered, recognizing that he was getting dangerously close to digging himself into a pit of lies, “I don’t really know Jenny all that well but I…just heard someone mention it. Anyway, I know this is not an ideal time or place but, uh, could I get you lunch?”

“I brought last night’s leftovers,” her voice said in his head but she grinned and said, “Sure. I have a half hour lunch break at eleven.”

“Cool,” Simeon said, “I’ll grab some Indian and meet you back here?”

“Sounds good,” she smiled and Simeon thought he could hear her cheering in his head.

He left the office again and started walking back towards his apartment. He had a couple hours before eleven so he was in no rush.

“So I was right about Jenny, and the ring,” he said to himself. “Could be my subconscious is just picking up on things.”

The receptionist could have said Jenny’s name while he was in the waiting room, for instance.

“I didn’t ask for her name,” he realized, smacking himself in the forehead. “Or if she likes Indian food.”

He looked back over his shoulder at the mental health clinic. He wasn’t about to go back inside again but he did have an idea. It couldn’t hurt, at least. Simeon walked over to the side of the building and leaned against the wall. That would place him around fifteen to twenty feet away from where the receptionist sat. To make him look less conspicuous he pulled out his cell phone and began looking up Indian restaurants.

“…hope he’s not a weirdo,” the receptionist’s voice said after a few moments. “I hope he just gets tikka masala and a ton of naan. He’ll probably go for one star spice but I hope he doesn’t. Spice is nice…Do I tell Dr Roche? She can’t tell me what they talked about but wasn’t he the emergency session? Shoot, what have I gotten myself into?”

Simeon made a note of her food preferences, though he wasn’t that comfortable with spicy foods himself. The rest of the mental monologue was only making him more self conscious so he decided to leave before it got any worse. What he was hearing was all just a hallucination anyway, right? It wasn’t her real thoughts he was hearing.

Overall, as days went, this one was definitely a mixed bag. Finally admitting to himself that he was hearing voices and that he needed to address it was not a high point for him, but he had the day off from work and a date in a couple hours. Probably wouldn’t get a second date out of it, which, the more he thought about it, would probably make his appointments with Dr Roche a little awkward.

“Oh well,” he sighed. Nothing he could do about that right now.